Finding home–some thoughts and poems about belonging

Finding home–what do we long for?

Finding home–we all long for a place we call home. Here’s one of my favorite quotes about home–

We are all longing to go home to some place we have never been — a place half-remembered and half-envisioned we can only catch glimpses of from time to time. Community. Somewhere, there are people to whom we can speak with passion without having the words catch in our throats. Somewhere a circle of hands will open to receive us, eyes will light up as we enter, voices will celebrate with us whenever we come into our own power. Community means strength that joins our strength to do the work that needs to be done. Arms to hold us when we falter. A circle of healing. A circle of friends. Someplace where we can be free.

Starhawk, from Dreaming the Dark: Magic, Sex and Politics (1982)

Creating a home for our children

And, of course, what we want more than anything is for our children to find a home–a place where they feel truly loved and accepted for themselves. A place where they can grow and try things out–and make mistakes. More than any physical space, we create this home in our hearts. Sharifa Oppenheimer writes that our job as parents is to carry the question “Who am I?” for our child until they are ready to carry it themselves. We can create a home for questions–a sanctuary for our children and ourselves.

Think about what makes you feel safe and protected. Also, consider how the world looks to a little one. Try physically to see it from their perspective–get down on your knees or tummy and look around. Remember what it feels like to be small and totally dependent on others.

And don’t forget to experience the wonder in everything around you–let yourself experience the newness each day or each moment like our little ones do. How does that shape your experience of home?

Finding home–trying to fit in

I’ve spent a lot of time and energy trying to fit in. Through observation and a mistaken idea of what it means to fit in, I’ve tried to shape myself into what I thought was an acceptable shape.

I wrote the first version of this poem when I decided to give up practicing law and become an artist instead–how’s that for meeting other people’s expectations!

Finding home

I built myself a little box

to live away my life in,

but when I tried to step inside,

I found I didn’t fit in.

So I took a little hammer,

and I pounded on my head

to see if I could cubify

to fit my little bed.

I pounded and I pounded,

but still I didn’t fit.

I needed a place to live in,

but I knew this wasn’t it.

So I put away the hammer,

and the box melted away.

Then I built a house for all of me,

and that’s where I live today

Susan Bruck

Finding home–our body as home

In my many years as an early childhood teacher, I observed children learning to inhabit their bodies–to make their physical bodies their home. Especially with the littlest ones, I sometimes felt like I was watching a game of bumper cars and could almost hear them saying–“how do you steer this crazy thing?!)

I often did verses about home with them during circle time. I’ve recorded two  favorites–you can check them out, if you want–I’ve written the words out below. (I don’t know who wrote either of them).

Deep the cellar–

Deep the cellar,

Timbers high,

Pointed roof

against the sky.

Drive the nails

straight and true,

this is home

for me and you.

Windows,

shining eyes that see;

Doors that open

to welcome me.

Fire burning

on the hearthstone bright,

This is home

on winter’s night.

author unknow

The mice were hungry

The mice woke up one morning,
and they were so hungry.
“Let’s find something to eat.”
So they crept up to the first floor,
but there was nothing to eat,
so they ran back down to the cellar.

But they were still so hungry.
“Let’s find something to eat.”
So they crept up to the first floor,
they crept up to the second floor,
but there was nothing to eat.
So they ran back down to the cellar.

But they were still so hungry.
“Let’s find something to eat.”
So they crept up to the first floor,
they crept up to the second floor,
and all the way up to the attic.

And there they found
a nice piece of cheese.
And they nibbled, nibbled, nibbled it
all up.
They nibbled, nibbled, nibbled it
all up.

Then they scattered the crumbs to the birds.
They scattered the crumbs to the birds.
They scattered the crumbs to the birds.

Then they went back down to the cellar
and fell asleep.

If you would like to see more nursery rhymes, circle songs, you check out my post: I’m a tall, tall tree

or two simple May Day songs

Finding home–finally

My wish for all of you–that you find your home–a home for body and soul. A home within you for your true self and a home where others love and welcome you for all of who you are and also who you aren’t.

You might also like to read my post about Xeniality: Welcoming others to your home.

Thanks for stopping by.

xoxo